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My First Rayban's

There comes a time in your life when your wishlist shrinks and quite like the bills that you so detest, you become infuriated with adult life and its ability to take away 'disposable income' . Suddenly shopping becomes that frantic sprint to the shops when you can no longer find underwear, nor are the holey tights deemed acceptable any longer and you realize that s**t this is it. Gone are the days where you pore over Depop scrolling for new clothes, bye bye student loan because real life doesn't quite work that way. Money doesn't grow on trees nor does it run fresh from the tap like that cocktail you so hungrily lapped up. Instead responsibilities loom close and I have forgotten the last time I had a bit of money to call my own. Since January I have been stuck in a financial limbo watching all the money drain out of my account and (not) for the first time in my life I was rendered 'broke-ass' broke.

But I had a dream, a dream where I could hold something valuable and call it my own. No, it wasn't a family heirloom nor was it a brand spanking new Mac, instead a longed to cradle a pair of Ray Ban's and call it my own. You may or may not know that I was meant to work with Ray Ban's after attending their brand collaboration with another brand who I will not name for the sake of anonymity. Having failed on their repeated promises of gifting me my very own Ray Bans I became disillusioned with anything designer, believing that they must be as stuck up as the reputation that proceeds them. So here I was broke, pissed off and wanting sunglasses that I couldn't afford. Except one day, like a beacon of hope I was offered an olive branch and was promised a pair of my very own Rayban's if I would attend their event, a Beyonce fitness class. Well... let me tell you something here I was shaking my non-existent breasts, hoping to come across as sexy as the Goddess herself Beyonce, except I looked like an eight year old boy but still I persevered, hoping that my sunglasses would be in reach soon. Two months later I was still waiting, getting gradually more pissed off as time went on, believing that the promise of gifting a pair of 'Raybans' was just an ulterior motive to get me to attend their class. But at last, two weeks ago my first Ray Bans arrived, nestled in a special 'hidey' box to protect it from mere mortals eyes. For these were no ordanairy sunglasses, no these were Ray Bans.

We all have a fetish ( ok maybe not fetish, obsession?) with something in our lives and while some may be enamored with a crisp swig of cider or get googly eyed over gaming I am drawn to the mysterious allure of sunglasses. Thus owning a pair of Ray Bans was something I could tick off the bucket list but would they live up to the hype? Would these £145 pair of sunglasses be anything more than 'label lust' or would they transform the way I viewed sunglasses forever? Truth was it was neither, at heart I like cheap things and despite how much I wanted a pair of Ray Ban's was I wanting it because it is deemed as cool or was it because I genuinely liked Ray Ban as a brand? It was a hard distinction to make but I came to the conclusion that Ray Ban's were an investment and while my Quay's at £30-£40 were £100 cheaper, it was nice to be awarded with the knowledge that my Ray Bans were infinitely more valuable, but it did also mean that these sunglasses would be on the shelf tucked away for special occasions. Truth is as much as I love Ray Ban's as a brand, being broke as I am and even more clumsy and disorganized I couldn't see myself wasting nearly £200 just on sunglasses when I could buy 6 pairs of Quay's and still have leftover change for rent. Should I have money to dispense and have more of a steady income then it might be a completely different story. That being said I nevertheless adore my Ray Bans and I feel very lucky to have been chosen.

In a way the late delivery of my Ray Ban's has coincided with the welcome return of fall- FYI my favourite season and not just because it is my birthday (ahem)- meaning that its vibrant orange polarized lenses perfectly captured the very essence of 'autumn'. The crisp crunch of autumn leaves underfoot are a welcome melody to my waiting era and a reminder that despite my lack of finances I should feel very lucky to be alive; instead of dwelling on what I do not have instead I should be grateful for what I do have. So with gratitude I gratefully accept my Ray Bans and despite its late arrival, I believe that its timing has turned out just right. When it was supposed to arrive I was in a bad state of mind and having lost my angels I was depressed and anxious. I couldn't sleep or eat and was working all the time which didn't help matters out. In truth I was writing and living but I wasn't living for me, I was living for others. I was a living, breathing robot caught in the dark expanses of time, watching the seasons melt into each other and wishing that the angels were there to share those memories with me. Shante in particular would have loved my Ray Bans, she loved anything fashion, especially something that she saw as designer. The girl had style and she loved anything that was worth a lot of money, she was a self-confessed princess through and through and while she may no longer be here to see me in my first pair of Ray Bans, I know that she will be happy now and at peace.

Shop The Look: Bomber Jacket - Primark / Sunglasses- Ray Bans / Skirt- Missguided

Do You Have A Special Pair Of Sunglasses That You Will Never Forget?

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