Here We Go Again

The last two months since I have moved to London had been both a 'dream' and a 'nightmare'. I fulfilled my dream of living in the mystical world of London where food, drink and company is just on your doorstep. Yet it became a nightmare too, I was drowning in London's intoxicating headiness and I didn't know which way to turn. I soon found that The Reality Of Living In London was not as clear cut as I once thought nor was it this magical place of opportunity that I expected it to be. But did I regret it? Not a chance; despite having to vacate my first London property less than two months into my stay in the 'big city' I realized that ultimately it was still my home and where I belonged. Last week you heard how after living in an infested room for just under two months I plucked up the courage to get myself out of there. The only thing that had been holding me back was my lack of money but I realized I had to leave before it was too late as the room was making me ill. As we cleaned the room [the landlord and I] found more bugs than you could ever care to imagine and as someone who now has a deep phobia of bugs it made me sick to my stomach. The entire day I was throwing up and being sick but still I worked not letting my illness stop me from leaving my asylum. When I called my best friend a few days earlier I was a mess panicking on the phone about my future and what I should do, she told me I was making the right choice.

Throughout my stay in the first property I kept saying I couldn't live there any longer but everytime there would be something that would hold me back. Eventually when it made me go into hospital I realized that this was it and I needed to get out before the room swallowed me whole. So any doubts I had about leaving, the day I was being sick made me more determined to find a place to live and so I did. Last Thursday after doing a 12 hour shift I packed up my stuff and moved to my dream location, the room was bigger and there was more space to put my things. Most importantly there were no bed bugs and I breathed a sigh of relief that the fading bites on my body would soon be invisible to the human eye. Still some things can seem too good to be true and after living only 5 days in the property the teething problems began. For a start their religious beliefs meant that they were very strict about certain things including who I was and wasn't friends with. Boys in particular were something they frowned against and when they overheard a conversation I was having with my best guy friend they acted coldly thereafter. Despite him being a best friend they believed that girls shouldn't be friends with boys and in all honesty I should have realized something was up when I asked whether it was ok for friends to stay round and they said 'friends or boys', with special emphasis on the word 'boys'. Still I thought nothing of it after all despite being an atheist I do respect religion because I believe we are all entitled to our own free will.

That wasn't the only issue either, I caught one of them snooping around in my room without my permission and my room was a mess because I was still unpacking. When I confronted them head on about what they were doing they told me that maybe I should move as there is a 'space issue'. Well of course that made me angry and to be frank upset, I hate people invading my personal space firstly and secondly how dare you go through my things, hoping I would be stupid enough to not realize that you had touched my stuff? It doesn't take a genius to figure it out. I told them I am not moving end of story and they said you have 15 minutes to think about it, we can move you to a bigger room that is more expensive if you like. No I bloody well don't want to think about it thanks and as the 15 minutes came to an end I stood my ground and said I didn't want to move. They tried to say they weren't forcing me to go but it sure as hell felt like they wanted me gone and the night after they came in my room again only this time I was already there. They said they didn't realize I was in the room to which I replied I don't like people invading my personal space which is true. They said that an inspector would be coming round and they had to postpone it because of me as though it was my fault.

I said my room was still going to be a mess because I needed to buy a chest of draws, a bookcase, a desk and another wardrobe to which they said we told you that you can move. I said no, it is my room I can buy all those things and more. But apparently this so called inspector might think there is two people in the room and I said but its just me. So apparently I have to wait until this inspector comes out to check my room before I can put away my books, jewellery and everything else that I have no space for at present . Since our 'fight' or confrontation things have been awkward and I try to keep out of their way because I know that one wrong move could kick me out. But despite the obstacles I have faced I love where I live because everything is on my door step and when I was looking at places two months ago this area was at the top of my list. I am grateful that I live somewhere where I can improve my wellbeing and I am happy that I have the freedom to call something my own. What happens next the world decides...

Will The Third Time Be A Charm? Find Out In Part III

*Update Written a week ago and things have gotten worse. One minute they are nice and the next minute they are threatening to kick me out. I don't want to move again but the way things are going I might have to.